I was with my ex husband all together for 19 years, before I decided to get divorced, I was the one who chose to walk away. He was a wonderful neighbor, friend, brother, uncle, and father. Unfortunately, more than one thing can be true at the same time.

He was also a narcissist, I endured a lot of mental abuse during our time together, our relationship was very toxic, it has taken a lot of healing, growth, shadow work, to understand my role. I understand now that someone can only love you as much as they love themselves. Back then during our time together, I did not.

Unfortunately, my next relationship was a revisit, a karmic bond, a mirror of what I hadn’t healed inside myself from being married all those years. A revisit of what was familiar, a cycle that repeated to wake me up, to inspire me to go on this healing journey I find myself on today.

These past relationships have been the catalyst, part of my walk through life, to create the person I am today. I really had to dig deep during my shadow work, and break the chains of a victim mindset, to come to an understanding, to instead use the knowledge, wisdom gained through those experiences to create the foundation I am standing on today.

God has helped me to break the chains, to stop cycles, flip the script from a negative mindset, to a positive one.

When asking God for strength, you have to go through situations to build that strength. When asking God for peace you first have to shift through the chaos. We stay stuck not because we’re not praying, but because we’re not willing to go through being uncomfortable to receive what we are praying for! Amen!